What am I doing with my life?

Damn.. I reached home yesterday after shoot feeling so tired and realised that it's already 23dec and I have not write Christmas cards like I always do. I told myself that I am going to do it this morning but when I woke up, it's already 11.30am and I think it's too late to send them out. Then, I opened up my FCE to edit my footages only to realise that I am staring at it, not knowing what to do because I don't have an establishing shot and don't have an opening sequence to start with. Also, for mywritinglab, it kept hanging on me and I even scored 0% for one of the topic.

XY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH YOUR LIFE?

Fucked up eh

Somehow being in the same diploma as your siblings is not a good idea because not only will the lecturers compare you, they will also make use of your siblings as an excuse.

Yes, very WTF. Seriously lecturer, I am paying attention in class, am not surfing facebook because it's boring much and never will I play games in class because it's very lame. So lecturer, if you have nothing to do, I hope you would extend our assignments deadline instead.

Stucked

Okay, so now I have an idea for my story but it's too short and lack of conflict.

You know it always pissed me off when my brother kept insisting that the stuffs belongs to him when I was the one who bought it. It's very very very irritating and annoying you see. I haven't been talking to him since last two week because of a phone. Yes, a phone. Very ridiculous isn't it?

He insisted that the new phone I bought was his because it was bought using his plan and will always come into my room whenever he's back from camp and says: "Oi, where's MY phone?"

Hello, you don't need to emphasize to me that that is your phone, because in the first place you said that we will share it - I'll use it on the weekdays and you will use it during the weekend. Although I find it very very stupid. So you don't have to emphasize to me that it is your phone when I bought it.

This is not the first time that such stupid thing happened already. 2 years ago, I helped him paid for his bloody iPhone and till now, he have not pay me back. And what I got in return, a year after the phone was bought, when he went to army was a iPhone with a spoilt-home-button. How nice was that.

And when my mum asked him, he told my mum because I didn't want to give him the iPhone so he used the new phone. Hello, you just want to use the new phone, and treat it as yours, don't want other people to use it. That's it. I know you very well. You don't need to come up with excuses.

I find it very funny having cold war with someone at the age of 22years old, over a phone. It's very stupid.

FED UP

I am very pissed off with my mum because of JOB & MONEY.

She asked me if I am working tomorrow and I said no because I need to rest. & she started saying why I'm always at home and not working, why am I always looking for jobs only after my holiday started and why I don't have plans for workings the week before holiday.

HELLOOOOOO~ What is her problem?

I work for this production as intern because I felt that it's a good opportunity for me to learn and get to know more people as well as, how things were done in the wardrobe department. I am happy there although I am complaining about how tired I am everyday. It is so much better than staying at home doing nothing okay!

When I stay at home, you said that I did nothing and only faced my lappie the whole day. When I work for this production, which I really enjoy doing, you said that I do not have plans for working and finding job. Then when I said I am not working the next day, you thought that my job is not regular. The truth is I don't wan to tire myself everyday doing the same things. I got to set my own schedule so why can't I rest on days which I want to? Even though, I am in need for cash now because my bank is dying soon, I need to rest also what. & furthermore, I will be paid for working as an intern, although I do not know how much I will be paid but what I've gained is the experience, opportunity and of course some money! So it's not a useless and wasting time job okay.

& when I talked to you nicely, you said you got no mood to talk to me because of this job & money issue. wth seriously. What you want me to do then?

Okay, feeling much better now. Move on with life~

fucked up mood

Feeling very angtsy and everything because there's some clever ass out there who think that editing is easy when you have to do fucking loads of photoshop-ing at the same time. & the best thing was, some clever ass' tasks were like damn easy because that clever ass just find talents and arrange them for shoot and recording. So easy right! wtf. _l_

Speechless

There's this person out there, just around me, feeling that he should let everyone around him know what's going on in his life, regardless of big or trivial matter. It's not the first time he did this. I was 'wrongly accused' by him, and everyone thinks that I was at fault. How nice.

I have got alot of colleagues involved here, let's named them A, B, C & D.

The first incident was when he tickled me out of a sudden while I was doing my own things during lunch break. I told him to stop but he refused. I had no choice but to defend myself by pushing my nails on his hand, and it bled. (: A few days later, the colleague (A) sitting beside him saw that mark on his hand and asked him what happened. He eventually told (A) that I did that on him without saying that he started everything first. (A) was very furious for what I did because she thinks that I was too ridiculous and wanted to confront me. I went speechless when he himself, told me about it. Like hey, hello, if you wasn't the one who started tickling me out of a sudden and even refused to stop, that mark will not appear on your hands.

So the next day, another colleague (B) advised me to cut my nails (apparently she knew what happened from him) and I literally showed (B) my nails. It's considered short as I just cut it the week before. (B) went speechless too and I took the opportunity to explain what actually happened and what that guy said wasn't true. I see no wrong in defending myself, right? He too, went speechless after I told that colleague what happened, I even have witness (C).

So, the second incident happened today.

He knew I was going to buy my lappie at IT SHOW 2010. And he advised me to buy this instead of that. I told him I don't need to because I think that what I wanted to buy was more than enough for me. He was very persistent and sounded like I will regret for the rest of my life if I didn't listen to him. He even said I didn't appreciate his kindness. I totally went speechless and threw my phone aside. I even showed JJ the sms conversation between me & him and JJ just said 2 words 'FUCK YOU'. (: Like hello, I am the one buying, not you. I am the one studying for FSV with my lappie, not you. I am the one making the final decision and not you. Thank you for your advice, I appreciate it very much but I do have my point of view too. I did not talk to him the whole day today. NO use of him apologizing to me too. Eventually he went to show the sms that I replied him to (C) & (D). (D) asked me what happened and I said, I couldn't tolerate his nonsense anymore and I resorted to this. I bet he told (A) about it too cos both of them were close and I shall see what he is up to now.

If (A) were to really confront me this time round, I will just say that, "It's time this human grow up, be it physically or mentally. You don't need to confront me on behalf of him. To think that you are an adult and you only listen to his story, I am once again, SPEECHLESS. If he really knew he was at wrong, he should know what to do." I want them to know that there's a limit to my patience.

I don't care who he tell. He can also broadcast to the whole world, I don't mind because basically, I don't need a loudspeaker to be my friend. Even if I am friend-less, I rather be alone.

How nice. My mum just told me that my cousin took my Tigger to her school today for don't know what activity. They even lied to me in a funny tone saying it was for donation (like WTFFFFFFFF). Take a brand new plushie for donation? Helloooooooo, I am keeping a collection of all my soft toys okay. HAPPY FAMILY you know? -.-

Well, I am not really angry or pissed or whatever but I believed that 1 phonecall to tell me isn't too much. It's not like I am very selfish but please, at least inform me. It's my presents given to me by my friends, my stuffs. Isn't it common sense to just at least let me know and the least I could do (even though I don't want) will be to tell her which one not to take? And the best thing was, the cupboard where I placed all my soft toys inside was messed up once again. Which means to say, I have to tidy them once again which I just did a week ago. How nice.

And once again, I told myself not to be angry with my mum. -.- (kns.)

I decided to take bus home today after work. Trying to see which transport cost me lesser to get back home. So while waiting for my bus outside Science Centre, this family of tourist approached me and asked me where's the nearest MRT station that they could go. So, in my mind was "198 can reach Boonlay MRT Station." and I told them that they could take 198 to Boonlay to take the train. However, I realised that I was outside Science Centre, so the nearest was Chinese Garden, and I told them the directions to Chinese Garden. They thanked me happily and started to walk (they only carry notes with them) to their destination. (:

Feeling so wonderful and happy that I've helped someone, I continued to wait for my bus. While waiting, I suddenly remembered that Jurong East MRT Station was the nearest instead. I boarded the bus and saw them walking, feeling so sorry for giving them the wrong direction. ):

At least I managed to help them. :D

Tomorrow is FRIDAY! Xinying's favourite day of the week because it means that weekends is coming! :D JJ is coming back soon too! Woah, sounds pretty fun this weekend. Chinese new year is just next week, shall ask JJ to go supermarket in the midnight again, so fun! (:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY 'FUTURE SIS-IN-LAW'! :D

What to choose?

Took half day off! :D

Had lunch with Sister and saw QQ!

All of us were busy working to feed our work till we got no time to meet up ):

Headed over to SP open house and the most WTH thing was, the goodie bag counter closed at 4.30pm. -.-

Dropped by NP too, and saw juniors there o.O

Spent our time eating donut and also, candy floss in the rain. How stupid, I know.

Walked all the way to take 157 home~! :D

Back home and my little brother got scolded again. Damn pissed off okay.

It's not once, but almost everydayyyyyy.

How irritating can that be?

Monday's release of O level result.

Fast, isn't it.

I'm mentally prepared now.

Cya ppl on monday. (:

All the best, everyone.

Sick

Xinying is feeling so tired and sick. Sore throat visited me once again.

iPhone version OS 3 is giving me endless problems. Well, actually I faced them when I update my iPhone to OS 3 in June and stopped using it after that. But because that's the only phone I have right now, so no choice.

Went to forums to check and now I can finally receive incoming calls but you people who want to contact me need to call the second time before you can get through. And if I replied your sms late, I'm sorry, because I will receive the sms at a later time. ):

So yupp, feeling terrible. Sore throat, flu and slight cough. I am sure fever is next.
Arrrgggggghhhhhhhhhh!

Shall continue with my homework..

Xinying! Persevere!

Why I didn't get the Colour Awards?
I served the school during my last 4 years as an active AVA Member and I didn't get it? WTFFFFFF.

The JVS Colours Award - It's basically for those who have given outstanding contributions to their CCA for the past4/5 years.

Worked as slave and got nothing as return except getting the EAGLES Award for 2007. TYVM (:

You people owed me testimonials for recommendations, for my poly admission. I demand that.

Been a busy busy week.

Everyday is all about homeworks.
So is this what graduating classes are going to face for the next 7months till O levels end?
Go to hell then. Yes, go to hell.

Initially, I changed my tuition to Thursday for this week but I skipped it because I went down to Suntec to meet JJ, Qamariah, Huimin & DX. They waited for me for hours, I'm very sorry! & they waited for me again because I haven had lunch.
Hahas, and throughout my lunch, JJ kept saying this to me "Eh, want buy TV anot? $599 for 32 inch. *points to flyers*"
Then he showed me another flyer and I said "This 42 inch one also $599?"
DX laughed. JJ said "Your dad's company ah? everything $599."
And that's when the $599 thing started, like this:

JJ: "Huimin, what you intend to buy?"
DX: "60GB thumbdrive for $599" *Everyone laughed*
~~~
DX: "Qamariah, what you intend to buy?"
ME: "1 TB Hard disk for $599."
JJ: "Crazy, I can get 4 of them leh."
~~~

So yes, went to IT Show 2009 on thursday and it's really torturing to carry my school bag there. My shoulders were very pain and I didn't even have seats in the train because adults just simply snatched them from me. Tyvm (:

Had Infocom Camp on Friday and we were all crazy.
Ordered Canadian Pizza for dinner & supper but aparently they were not enough.
Played facebook awhile and watched dramas and slept. We were like taking turns to sleep on the mattress and they even went to ordered Mac at 3am.

Woke up early to prepare for Adam Khoo's program.
Dreaded it at first but afterall, enjoyed myself alot.
Not only were the trainers funny and crazy, the messages behind it were interesting too.
There's this activity where Melvin one of our trainers asked us to do.
"I want.." He want us to declare to the whole class, what we want.
I thought for a damn long time, because I was the last.
& then I said: "I want to get into FSV next year." *I really dk what else to say.*

Then I asked myself, do I really want to get into FSV? What's so good about FSV that makes me feel like going there? Is that really my interests and passion? Will I really enjoy my 3 years there after my O levels (if I did well enough to get into it)? I am now seizing all the opportunities that are going to benefit me in getting into FSV. But am I really going to get in there? I can't find any other things that I am interestd in. I shall consider more before making this choice.

Anyway, the program was really interesting and motivating.
Goals are not only important, they tell you where you're heading to.
Feeling motivated is easy, but trying to achieve what you really want is really difficult and you have to be prepared to scarifice everything for it. So now I asked myself again, "Am I prepared for it?"

I was very tired after coming back from school yesterday.
Slept at 7.30pm and woke up at 9.30am this morning. Slept for 14 hours! Half day gone just like that. But well, quite energetic now, so still not bad. And I kept thinking that today is SATURDAY! Because I went to school yesterday and I thought today is Saturday. What the fuck am I thinking? There's chinese mock exam tomorrow! *runs to books and worksheets now*

Shall update more if I have time to sit infront of the computer to relax and listen to old love songs. :D Happy holidays to those who have 'Holidays'.